Sleep, the welcome reprieve from a day filled with the toils of modern life. A chance to rest the mind and body, to process the days thoughts and emotions and the chance to escape to a world of your own creation. However for some like me the inevitable promise of sleep fills us with dread.
I have suffered nightmares from as early as I can remember, to this day they have the ability to keep a hold of me during the waking hours also.
The first reoccurring nightmare I can recall involves me visiting the bathroom as a boy of about age 6. The room is as ever cold, with toiletries in the window and a damp towel thrown over the side of the bath. At this point I an unaware I am dreaming. I proceed to use the toilet when the light flickers and dies. The door which I kept slightly open for just such a case slams shut, and a Demonic voice hisses "DANIEL". It is then that I awake. For years I have hated anyone using my full first name for that very reason.
These days my nightmares consist of situations and memories passed, coated in layers of misery and self loathing. Other times I see horrific images of people I never met displaying terrible cruelty to each other, powerless to stop them.
The worst include people I love/have loved. I lose them time and time again and each morning the feeling of loss is as powerful as it was in reality. My head has a tendency to torment itself.
Whilst no firm explanations exist as to why some suffer restless sleep more then others, I attempt to harness these visions and feelings and use then in the creative writing process.
If I must endure these nightmares the lest I can do is to bring them to life for you, dear reader.